


Bliss, Balance and Birth

by crossingwinter



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Domestic Fluff, F/M, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-04
Updated: 2019-03-04
Packaged: 2019-11-09 06:46:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17996888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crossingwinter/pseuds/crossingwinter
Summary: Ben teaches their daughter to read.





	Bliss, Balance and Birth

**Author's Note:**

  * For [selunchen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/selunchen/gifts).



> Written as part of the [Reylo Gifts Project](https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1gzCrJVb6XKKX3tmeNpsm-aVPUYkfQHO_SNma13Pr7Bg/edit#gid=0) for [@selunchen](https://twitter.com/selunchen), who drew [this](https://twitter.com/selunchen/status/1079993346565832704) [art](https://selunchen.tumblr.com/post/181604715717/mornin-tumblr-i-made-a-baby-for-reylo-anthology) for the [Reylo Charity Anthology](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/reylocharityanthology_volume1) last year!
> 
> Thank you to jeeno2 for betaing!

“Cherek,” she guesses, her lips pouting out and her tongue sticking out between her teeth.  Her little brow is furrowed in confusion and she looks so like Rey it makes his heart stop in his throat when he looks down at her.

“Why is it a cherek?” he asks her, resting his hand gently on her back.  She wiggles a little bit, chewing her tongue.

“Because it’s a moon,” she says, looking up at him with her big dark eyes.

_ “She’s got your eyes,”  _ Rey had told him the first time he’d seen her, pink and wrinkly and still with a little bit of her birthing blood flecking her skin.  Rey looked exhausted, but undefeated. She was holding her so tightly, as though she’d never let her go.  _ Never leave her behind. _

Breha’s eyes are wide as she looks up at him, waiting.  

“But is it a straight edge moon, or a slant?” he ask, tracing the letter over the holopad with his finger.  Breha mimics the movement in the air.

“Oh!  It’s a krill!  It’s a krill!”

“Very good,” Ben says and he leans over sideways to press a kiss to the top of her head.  “And what’s this one?” The letter on the screen changes.

Her tongue is poking back out of her mouth again as she focuses on the letter, her big brown eyes so wide.   _ How can Rey think she has my eyes?  _ Ben wonders not for the first time.  There’s more to eyes than color, and Breha’s eyes are Rey’s completely—all curiosity and bravery and stubbornness.  His eyes are many things, but not that precise combination.

“Qek,”  she says at last, wiggling her finger in an approximation of the letter’s shape in the air.

“Good,” he says again.  “And this one?”

“Besh!” she shouts delightedly at once. “Besh for Breha!”

“Besh for Breha,” Ben agrees with a grin.  He makes to scoop her up by the hips and pull her into his lap, but she dances away from his hand.  “No?” he asks her.

“No, I want to stand,” she tells him.  She’s started doing this more and more.  Stand where she used to cuddle, run away where she used to cling to legs.   _ “Just what a child always does,” _ his mother had told him.   _ “You were like that too.” _

But Ben can’t remember that.  He just remembers nightmares and wanting not to be alone in the dark.

“Ok,” he replies, trying to ignore the heavy feeling in his heart.

He hadn’t wanted her.  Well, not Breha specifically—any child at all.  He didn’t think he’d make for a good father, thought it would be better for that mighty Skywalker line to end, thought that any child of his would be doomed to darkness, the way Vader was, the way Luke nearly was, the way he…

But Rey had wanted a family, and Ben had learned better than to deny her anything she wanted that badly.  “ _ I’m afraid too—what if I manage to be a worse mother than my own? _ ” she had demanded with tears in her eyes.   _ “But that’s not a good reason.  Fear is not a good reason, Ben. _ ”

And she’d been right.

He’s still afraid.  He’s more afraid of Breha now that she’s alive and wiggling and sticking her tongue out of her mouth as he goes over the Aurebesh with her than he was when she was a nebulous concept.  An  _ it _ , not a child.  But the fear’s different now.

_ “Were you afraid I’d run away and not come back?”  _ he asked his mother once.  Pain flitted across her face, but he’d expected that.  It always does, when he asks the honest question. 

_ “Always,” _ she said at last.   _ “And you always did.”   _ There was a steeliness in her voice as she looked at him, as though daring him to contradict her, just so she could say  _ “You did come back, Ben.  You did. _ ”

“Besh resh esk herf aurek.  Breha!” She’s chattering away and Ben smiles down at her.  That’s why she’d wanted to start learning, though she’d never admit it.  She wanted to learn how to spell her name.

_ “I taught myself to read using old Rebellion logs, _ ” Rey had told her.  “ _ There was a helmet near  me that had a name very near my own.  Resh enth herf. Raeh.”  _

_ Did you name yourself?  _ Ben never asks her.  He wouldn’t be surprised.  She probably doesn’t remember.  Did she forget the name her worthless parents gave her and create herself completely in the sands of Jakku, Rey born from Raeh?

“Besh esk nen,” Breha is jabbering.  “Resh esk yirt.” She grins up at him, her baby teeth uneven, her eyes delighted with herself.

“Very good,” he tells her.  “Did you tell your mother?”

“Tell me what?” Rey calls from the window.  She’s gardening, the dawn light creeping in just behind her and making her look almost like an angel, the way her hair glows behind her head.

“Besh esk nen,” Breha repeats.  “Resh esk yirt. Besh resh esk herf aurek.”

Rey looks over at them both, the sweetest smile sweeping across her face.

Rey has three types of smile—the one she doesn’t mean, the one she thinks she means, and the one she doesn’t realize she means.  This one’s that last one, her eyes going bright, her face lighting up like the sun at her back.  _ How could she think that Breha has my eyes? _

“Very good,” Rey says.  “What about grandma’s name?” 

And the proud smile slips from Breha’s face as she stares first at Ben and then at his holopad.  Her mouth is open now with concentration and Ben exits the little test screen he’d programmed up for her and begins to type.  

“What’s LLLLL?” he asks her, holding his tongue just behind his teeth and making a leth sound.  

Breha makes the noise too, hoping it will help her and Rey grins and puts down the pot of plants she’s hoping for.  

“LLLLLL,” Ben continues to hum before dropping his tongue down.  “Ehhhhh”

“Leth!” Breha shouts.  “Leth!”

“That’s right!” he grins.  “And the rest you already know.”

“I do?”

“Leia.  Leeeeeeeey,” he draws the syllable out and Breha’s eyes go wide.   

“Esk yirt,” she says, and she points to Rey, and Ben nods.  “Leth esk yirt aurek!” She looks so pleased with herself that he can’t help it—he picks her up and tugs her onto his lap and hugs her close while she squirms out of his grip.  “No! Daddy! Stop it!”

He lets her slide loose and she’s immediately pattering away towards Rey, repeating “Leth esk yirt aurek.  Leth esk yirt aurek. Leth esk yirt aurek,” to memorize and tell her grandmother later on. 

She stops next to the urn that Rey’s planting in, her hands and clothes and parts of her face covered in dirt.  “Leth esk yirt aurek,” Breha tells her mother.

“Yes,” Rey grins.  “Exactly.”

“We all have esks in our names,” Breha says.  “Daddy and I have beshes, you and grandma have esks and yirts.  And grandma and I have aureks.” She looks delighted with herself and Ben’s hands get a little bit tight on the holopad.  

_ We all made you,  _ he thinks as he looks at his daughter and Rey sitting in the sunshine streaming in through the window.  Breha’s putting her hands in the dirt now, helping Rey hold the plants while she gets them solidly repotted, and she’s giggling as she mushes it between her fingers.   _ Rey made herself, and we made you.   _

He looks at Rey and when Rey looks back at him, she and Breha are both giggling, and they both have the same eyes, and gods, Rey’s right about so much—she’d been right about having Breha—but  _ how _ can she not see that they have the same eyes?

**Author's Note:**

> You can find the [Aurebesh](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Aurebesh) here.
> 
> You can find me on [twitter](http://twitter.com/crossing_winter) and [pillowfort](http://pillowfort.io/crossingwinter)


End file.
